[pyrefly] Share invalidation queueing lifecycle

[lyydsheep]

Fixes #4300

Summary

• Consolidate the duplicated asynchronous invalidation transaction lifecycle into one private queueing helper.
• Preserve ordinary invalidation telemetry, streaming, test-only pre-commit pause, cancellation, commit order, and completion behavior.
• Preserve configuration invalidation completion conditions and keep it independent of the ordinary invalidation pause.
• The local .scratch planning files are intentionally not included in this PR.

Validation

• cargo test -p pyrefly lsp_interaction::configuration — 22 passed
• cargo test -p pyrefly lsp_interaction::diagnostic — 37 passed, 1 existing ignored
• cargo test -p pyrefly lsp_interaction::file_watcher — 3 passed
• cargo test -p pyrefly lsp_interaction::cross_file_invalidation_project_mode — 3 passed
• cargo test -p pyrefly lsp_interaction::did_change — 3 passed
• python3 test.py --no-test --no-tensor-shapes --no-conformance --no-jsonschema — passed; one pre-existing Clippy warning in crates/pyrefly_config/src/error_kind.rs

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